Bears: Worst 6-6 Team in the History of the NFL?

It would take a serious effort to convince me otherwise.

Fire Joe the Somebody

ZJ beat to the punch on this one. My first though on hearing about FJM's demise was that I (and maybe some friends) could fill the void pretty easily. Not that I could hope to be half as funny as those guys, but I'd probably be just as good as ripping holes in terrible sports journalism. Of course my first though was to try to get firejoebuck.com, but it looks like I was little slow on the draw again. It also looks like firejoebuck.blogspot.com is taken, but not really being used for anything. What a pity. I bet either of those would generate a decent amount of traffic. I thought about focusing on Chicago sports, but with Marrioti gone from the Sun-Times, Rosenbloom is the biggest hack in town, and I'm not sure many people know who he is. Oh well, I'll think about it.

While I'm talking sports, Phil Rogers in the Tribune has this nugget:

Free agents Raul Ibanez and Bobby Abreu have been mentioned, but don't be surprised if Hendry instead adds a lesser hitter with more flexibility, such as the Kansas City Royals' Mark Teahen...

DeJesus would not be moved cheaply, but sources hinted the Cubs could get the 27-year-old Teahen for a package built around either Felix Pie or one of two young infielders, Mike Fontenot and Ronny Cedeno.

More flexibility? Are we talking ability to touch his toes, or willingness to ride the bench for long periods of time? Hopefully it's the later, because this guy's numbers look even worse than Fukudome's. Pie and Cedeno I can live without, but Fontenot had a .911 OPS last year. Admittedly he platooned and only had about 280 PAs, but his OPS wasn't that much worse against lefties (.893, very small sample size, though) and actually his OBP was a little better. Teahen had a .715 OPS last year (with a whopping .313 OBP) and struck out almost three times for every walk he drew. I swear, if Hendry moves Fontenot (packaged or otherwise) for Teahen, I'm quitting the Cubs.

The coveted GiT endorsement goes to...

Barack Obama. There you have it. I will vote for him tomorrow. I probably even would have volunteered some time if I didn't have fifty papers to grade and a test to write tomorrow. I'm not going to write much more for the same reasons. My main reason for this choice is that John McCain is a repulsive scumbag who has run a revolting campaign. That's good enough for me.

Dog Bites Man

Yes, I know that like all men, all politicians have a disposition towards mendacity. But John McCain excels supremely at the practice even by politicians' standards. I really don't think he's capable of opening his mouth without just making shit up. Here he goes again today:

“My opponent is working out the details with speaker Pelosi and Senator Reid to raise your taxes, increase spending and concede defeat in Iraq. He’s measuring the drapes. And as you noticed, the night before last, he gave his first address to the nation before the election. And this week he settled on a chief of staff!’’

The RNC also has made a similar statement, based on this blurb. So, yeah. Anonymous sources have said that "Obama's campaign has approached Illinois Rep. Rahm Emanuel about possibly serving as White House chief of staff" (emphasis added), which contact has been denied by Emanuel's office. In McCain-speak this becomes "He settled on a chief of staff!"

Reminiscent of earlier this week when McCain claimed that Obama had written his inaugural address. Actually, an aide had written a hypothetical address for a generic Democratic candidate before he was even working for the Obama campaign.

And when the Washington Post accuses a candidate of perpetuating a vile smear - well, that's probably as close they'll ever come to publishing the truth - the man is a habitual liar.

Second Prize (Updated Below)

Last weekend, I traveled to the lovely Wisconsin Dells, along with pals Greg and Niko (neither of whom are terrorists) for the 25th annual Dells Spells Scrabble tournament. I entered as the 13th seed out of 18 in Division I. Almost two months ago I quit playing online Scrabble, and I haven't done any kind of word study since Arden Cup in May, so my expectations were low. I set of goal of a 6-6 record for the weekend. Play began early Saturday morning. Here's a game by game breakdown.

Game 1 vs. Vincent V. Vincent is a club-mate that I haven't beaten in a long time. He started with JAWING for 50, but I came right back with FITTINGs, and was leading most of the game, until I lost a turn by challenging SCUP. Not sure what I was thinking there; it just looked bad to me. He was able to capitalize on the remaining esses, and I lost 356-413. Record: 0-1 -57

Game 2 vs. Michael D. For the second straight game, I bingoed on my first turn, this time with ALEURON. Michael tried REWATER* for a 2x2 on his second turn, which I challenged off. I couldn't block both spots for WATERER on his next turn, and he pulled a blank bingo out of the bag (I don't remember the word) on the next turn. I was able to answer with CORNEAS, but that set him up for WHEY for 49 on a triple. I got another free turn later when I challenged off AEROS*, and managed to get within two points, but his blank and S in the endgame were too much to overcome. Final score: 402-425. Record: 0-2 -80.

I was kind of irritated to lose a game in which I won two challenges, but the karma started to swing my way.

Game 3 vs. David J. This time I didn't bingo until my second turn with SODOMiTE to a triple. I led almost the whole way and prevailed 388-338. Record 1-2 -30.

Game 4 vs. Winter. This was a real back-and-forth shootout and probably the most fun game of the tournament for me. I struck on my third turn with TESTOOn, Winter hit back-to-backs with ANORETIC and REVIEWER in the top of the fifth and sixth, and I came right back with CTENOID, and clinched it with OUTLEARN. Score: 477-431. Record 2-2 +16.

I head to lunch right on pace for my goal. But I've got some tough games in the afternoon.

Game 5 vs. Lisa 0. Two impressive plays from Lisa. She used the L from my ZLOTY for a sweet 2x2: RURALITY for 90. She also got down AQUATONES for 89 later. Both were blank bingoes, but I don't remember which letters. I only managed the pedestrian STANINE. Score: 372-432. Record: 2-3 -44.

Game 6 vs. Joey M. Well, I pulled ZITHERS out of the bag for a 108 point head-start. I ran into some U-trouble on my next turns, but was rewarded when I chickened out of the clearly superior CUTUP and opted for MEOU. I got down PICAYUnE to a triple for 95, and continued to draw well enough to keep Joey out of the game. Final: 468-321. Record 3-3 +103.

Game 7 vs. Melissa R. The first bingo didn't come until the bottom of the fifth this game, when I put down LANDsmEN for a whopping 58 points. I could've gotten iNLANDs down for a few more, but having both blanks is usually too much for me to process for some reason. Melissa countered with UNHAILED, but I was able to get EROTICS a turn later, and then after playing YUM to an IOOP leave, with the idea of scoring, taking out a hot-spot, and clearing some of the crap out of my rack, I hit POISONER. No substitute for luck. Final: 438-372. Record 4-3 +169.

I was incredibly satisfied with my first day. 4-1 over my last 5 games, and it turned out I was just warming up. Sunday's games:

Game 8 vs. Steve H. The bingo early formula worked again. Holding ?BKNOOR on my second turn, I saw two of the possible eights, and Steve obligingly laid out an O for me. He came back nicely with HEADY for 45, but I laid down FETIALES for 84. I opted for this over FEALTIES, because I figured there was a small but extant chance that the former would draw a challenge, which it did. The extra turn, and continued decent draws sealed the deal. Final: 426-369. Record: 5-3 +226.

Game 9 vs. Marty M. Bingo early and often is a winning formula. For the second straight game I bingo on my 2nd and 3rd turn. This time it's WIDENER followed by UNABATED (a good Sunday word). I also get big Z, X and J plays. Final: 485-325. Record: 6-3 +386.

Game 10 vs. Mike W. SNORTED on my third turn was followed by REATONE* from Mike, which I challenged off. I was kind of surprised; although I'd only played Mike once before, I had seen a decent number of games at Twin Cities this spring (which he won), and was impressed by his word knowledge. Mike had to spend some turns fishing, and meanwhile I got down AGELESS, and later BATTERIE. Final: 490-321. Record: 7-3 +555.

Game 11 vs. Jim K. I just drew everything this game. I got VESICANT for 102 in the top of the second, as Jim struggled through tough racks. OUTFINd put the game out of reach, although I did stumble and try BAILY*, my only phony of the tournament. I got the turn back when Jim tried HOA*, and I hit MeNTORS late. Final: 495-291. Record 8-3 +759.

This put me in second place. I joked with Steve Pellinen before Sunday's games that I just needed to win out to clinch the tournament. Actually, it turned out that Joey was 9-1 going into Round 11, so I needed Lisa to beat him to have a shot, which she did. I had Joey on spread, so a win would've clinched it. The anticlimax:

Game 12 vs. Joey M. Joey opened with VESPID, and I had ?AAEGNU. I sensed there was something there, but I just didn't feel good about GUANAsE. I opted for VAU over VAGUE, thinking I had a very good chance of bingoing on the next turn. Indeed, I got tANKAGE down at 7H (the only playable bingo), but this allowed Joey to hit OXO for 42, and after a series of good plays (including TOKENED for 55, and WAISTED for 89 followed by HEMOSTAT for 64) he pulled away. The last blank allowed me to do QIs/HEMOSTATs for 72, keeping it somewhat respectable. I can't feel bad about this one, I just got outplayed by a better player. Score: 368-452.

Final Record: 8-4 +675 2nd Place. Tons of fun overall, and I'm looking forward to the Twin Cities tourney next month.

Update: I forgot to congratulate Niko for taking 2nd place in Div. 2 with a 10-2 record. We were both playing for the division win in our final games. Also my new rating is up and it's 1706! About time I made that milestone; I was at 1660 after Annapolis in May of 2007.

Debate

Well, I guess a relatively uneventful debate is good for the guy who's solidly leading in the polls. Obama looked alright overall. I think he should have brought Iraq up first and foremost in the budget cutting question, and missed an easy point on the Ahmadinejad question: How would putting preconditions on a meeting remove the purported legitimizing effect of meeting with Ahmadinejad? I'm assuming "preconditions" here means something like allowing in inspectors, or suspending nuclear activities and not repudiating statements about Israel*. McCain did manage to make himself look pretty ridiculous with his repeated bleating of "How can we sit across a table...", and condescending with his "Senator Obama doesn't understand..." remarks.

*I suppose calling McCain on the mistranslations of Ahmadinejad's comments would have backfired.

As of this moment...

The Cubs have six players with at least 20 HRs on the year, and none with at least 30. I have to believe this is a unique occurrence in the history of MLB.

Umm...

That's right. Los Hermanos Coen will be filming in the building where my office is. And my colleague tells me there was a casting call out last month. I need to start paying more attention to my surroundings.

Sour Lou

I really don't understand why Piniella didn't try to win this one. Even though the Cubs' scrubs have been giving the Mets all they can handle, I think there's a great case for doing everything possible to avoid seeing Santana twice in a five game series, even if both starts are likely to be on short rest.

Maybe he's planning on throwing all three games this weekend. But since we're talking about the man who had DeRo lay down two sacrifice bunts this year ahead of the likes of Fukudome and McGehee, it's probably just another poor tactical decision.

There Ought to Be a Rule...

I'm not going to lay any blame for yesterday's debacle on the officiating. Lord knows the Bears deserved to lose that game after blowing at least a dozen chances to ice it. Zero sacks in sixty-plus pass attempts pretty much says it all. But I do have some general advice for officials:

When in doubt about a fumble, DON'T BLOW THE PLAY DEAD. The Bears have been screwed twice already this season when clear fumbles on opponents' kickoff returns were ruled down. If there's any doubt about whether a fumble occurred, let the play go on until a ruling can be made on who has recovered. Rule that the play wasn't a fumble after the fact if you wish. Then the play may be challenged and if you were wrong and it was a fumble (as with those kickoff returns, or with the Hochuli play), the ball may given to the proper team. This is so obvious, that I can't believe it isn't already policy in NFL.

John Montgomery McBurns: Still Lying

A McCain/Palin spot (I think it's called "Original Mavericks", but I couldn't find it on YouTube) I saw during my vain attempt to catch a piece of the Cubs' division-clinching victory this weekend claims that Palin stopped the bridge to nowhere. It's kind of hard to believe they're still reiterating this crap after its thorough debunking weeks ago. One can only hope (if not expect) that this backfires with anyone who's been paying a modicum of attention.

RIP DFW

I won't say that David Foster Wallace's suicide shocked me. I didn't really know much about the Philo, Illinois native's life until after the fact, but the timing was very strange for me. I hadn't read any of his work until about a month ago, when I picked up a copy of Consider The Lobster on the cheap. I have since polished off three of his books in quick succession, and quickly became something like enamored. 

A friend had recommended A Supposedly Fun Thing I'll Never Do Again and lent me Brief Interviews with Hideous Men some time ago. I never got around to these until after reading Lobster in a matter of days. I bought Lobster knowing that "Up Simba", the essay on McCain's 2000 run, was apropos of current happenings and had been spoken of well in various corners of the blogosphere. "Simba" turned out to be one of the weaker essays in the collection. Some of the questions raised, such as whether McCain is really "a different kind of politician" seem kind of quaint in light of the current campaign, and some of the assertions, i.e. "if... you don't bother to vote, you are in fact voting for the entrenched Establishments", are kind of absurd. However, the highlights are very high. "Big Red Son" managed to paint a horrifying picture of the porn industry without being at all moralistic, and he manages to write a riveting review of an English usage dictionary in "Authority and America Usage". (Yes, the fact that I'm kind of a language nerd may detract from my testimony here.)

Maybe more surprising is that the eponymous essay in A Supposedly Fun Thing, which is about DFW's journey on a week-long Carribean cruise, is also quite interesting, while describing what seems to be a mostly stultifying experience. The collection also has a nice analysis of David Lynch's oeuvre, in the guise of a review of Lost Highway.

Brief Interviews clicked less with me, and I suspect this may be true of his fiction style in general. Nonetheless, it's clear that the man possessed a great talent, and as soon as I have a few weeks to spare, I may give Infinite Jest a try.

Lesson Learned

Okay, I don't really want to turn this into purely a sports blog; I promise I'll post about something meaningful eventually. But I have to say that was encouraging.

I admit I watched the Bears' third preseason game. I can't remember the last time I watched preseason anything (if ever), but living alone in Northfield and jonesing for some football will do strange things to a man. It affected my assessment of the Bears' prospects a tad too much. Why would guys whose starting jobs are safe not sandbag and risk injury? I retract my statement that a five-win season wouldn't surprise me

Now, I accept all the caveats. Gimpy Manning missed a half-dozen throws that healthy Manning would have nailed. Clark and Saturday were out. In the broader view, the defense still looks overly injury-prone and the safety position in particular is a huge concern (yeah, it would be great to have Chris Harris rather than whomever we got with that fifth-rounder). But this was still a convincing win against a quality opponent on the road. 

Also, it was nice to see the D stepping up big twice after getting completely boned by the officiating crew. 

BS Bears

I sure hope the Bears' D was playing the third game of the preseason like it was bullshit. But that's probably bullshit. On the other hand, I hope the 49ers' D was playing like it wasn't bullshit. But that may not be bullshit.

Orton undeniably put up great numbers, mostly because he had all day to throw to receivers that were wide open. Of course, the facts that the line gave him all day and that the receivers got wide open were encouraging. We'll see what happens in a real game, I suppose.

On the other hand, it's hard to comprehend how the dominant D of '05 and '06 (differing by only two starters, I believe) has become such a joke. I'm having nightmares of Adrian Peterson (V) passing out in the late fourth quarter against the Bears after having run one too many 80-yard dashes down the middle of the field.

The Sporting News

Before the Cubs swept the Brewers I was ready to call the Central for Milwaukee, so you may not want to take my opinions seriously. However, my assessment of the State of the Cubs follows.

Obviously, no major complaints about the starting pitching.

My concerns about the bullpen can be stated in two words: "Bob Howry". If the Cubs were playing anyone but the Cards (or Brewers) on Friday night I honestly would have been rooting for him to blow yet another game, so maybe Lou would start to consider not using him when the game is on the line. I just don't understand the confidence in a mediocre career reliever. He's got a stellar K/BB ratio, but does that really matter when half the balls going into play are making it to at least to warning track. The Cubs have four solid relievers (assuming Wood's healthy) and that should be more than enough, but why do I have this sinking feeling that Howry's going to be trotting out in the seventh inning of Game 1 in the NLDS with the Cubs up 3-2?

I'm more worried about the offense. We've got a right fielder who can't hit and a first baseman who has hit four home runs since May 29th, is slugging .475 for the season despite a hot start, and seems to always be good for a ground ball with men on base. Moving DeRosa to RF, Fontenot to 2B and benching Fukudome seems like the right move to me, but I doubt it will happen.

Remember how the 2000 White Sox put up runs in bunches all year and hit a wall during the ALDS?

Guatemala (Pictures)

Finally, here are some pictures from our trip to Guatemala last month. Like the majority of tourists arriving by air, we headed straight for Antigua after landing in Guatemala City. Antigua, a 16th century colonial city, lies below the inactive Volcan de Agua (above). We were lucky to get that shot: The volcano was obscured by clouds for most of our stay.

Here is a shot of the Santa Catalina arch:


After going for a swim, we walked up a mountain and had some nice views of the city below:


The Museum of Santo Domingo had a moving exhibition about the disappeared during the Argentine Dirty War. This piece shows the artist's disappeared father from our point of view:


The image gradually fades to blankness as one walks around to the back of the sculpture.

After staying a couple of days in Antigua, we headed to Panajachel, on Lake Atitlan.
This is the view from our hotel the first night:


This place was about a 20-minute walk outside of town, and we heard from the locals that the road wasn't safe at night, so we moved down into town for the next two nights. Here's a typical shot of Calle de Santander:





We headed to nature reserve later. See if you can spot the monkey:


A day later we took some boat trips to other towns on the lake,


and saw San Pedro and Santiago, both more impoverished and less touristic than Panajachel.

The cathedral in San Pedro:


In Santiago we visited an effigy of the local saint Maximón. Unfortunately, the camera ran out of batteries at this point, but there's a picture at the link.

The next day we said goodbye to Lake Atitlan and its volcanoes,


and headed stopped back in Antigua for one more night on our way back to Mexico.

Duluth, Duluth

Heading out to Duluth in a couple of minutes. I'm excited to be visiting the birthplace of Bob Dylan and Low. I promise a full report (and, yes, those some pictures finally) upon return.

Veggie Bite

I wholeheartedly endorse Veggie Bite.

Burger, gyro and salad were all delicious.

Mt. Greenwood always seems to have a token veggie/vegan place, and they usually go belly-up with six months or so. I hope this place is still around next time I'm in the Chi-tizzle. We only saw one other customer during what should have been peak dinner time, though.

Top Non-obvious Things About Being Back in the States

1. Not worrying about what I eat and drink. I managed to evade any serious health incidents over a seven-week stay in Mexico/Guatemala, but after the incidents during my first trip to Mexico, I just don't trust the water/street vendors. I don't know if my distrust of filtered Mexico City tap water is irrational (need to check that out), and boiling everything just isn't a practical option. The unfortunate result is was a small-landfill's worth of water bottles emptied during my stay.

2. Being a few hundred feet above sea-level. I kind of feel slightly fatigued whenever I'm in Mexico. It's worst when I first arrive, and my body gradually adjusts. I haven't had a chance to go running since I returned, but I bet I'm going to feel like my lung capacity has tripled.

Guatemala was awesome. I'll post about it when I get I finally get the pictures onto the computer.

Unretirement

David Haugh writes the unthinkable. Jim Edmonds's performance as a Cub has already been more than enough to heal my mental scars, but this is another league altogether. I say nothing short of a Superbowl ring is worth seeing Favre wear the orange and blue. And I don't think the Bears are anything more than a 1 in 12 shot even with the Favre of last season (remember he was in a precipitous two-year decline before last year's renaissance). And Haugh's just lost it when he proposes giving up a first-rounder plus:

Look at it this way: If Favre makes the Bears as good as they could be with him, their draft choice will be later in the first round anyway. If the Bears keep the pick to avoid the Favre sweepstakes and finish under .500 again—which many people outside Halas Hall expect—then they will strongly consider using it on a quarterback anyway with Rex Grossman and Kyle Orton both signed to short-term deals.

Presumably that first-round quarterback would have a career expectancy of longer than one year starting in 2009. (OK, with Angelo picking, maybe it's a close call.)

Anyway, I think the best (and probably most likely) scenario for the Bears is that Packers "come to their senses", Favre starts for them this year, reverts back to his 2007 form, and delays the development of Rodgers for one more year.

New Blog

This is my new blog. I have a blog documenting my Scrabble woes already; this is for everything else. I expect sports, politics, books, travels and random trivia to be the main topics. My handle is ripped from one of the three funniest movies I've ever seen.